


a place you can call your own (a place we can call our own)

by yananism



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: M/M, but seventeen loves him, happy birthday soonyoung, hoshi cries a lot, hoshi gets sad, i missed jun's sorry baby, this is bad I'm sorry, this is unoriginal but i had to do it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-15
Updated: 2020-06-15
Packaged: 2021-03-03 22:54:16
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,904
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24743413
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yananism/pseuds/yananism
Summary: it wasn’t like soonyoung expected a big party or a bucket of gifts, but he at least expected his members to wish him a happy birthday and acknowledge his presence.orit's soonyoung's birthday and nobody seems to remember.
Relationships: Kwon Soonyoung | Hoshi & Everyone, Kwon Soonyoung | Hoshi/Lee Jihoon | Woozi
Comments: 4
Kudos: 72





	a place you can call your own (a place we can call our own)

soonyoung woke up to the sound of his alarm, groaning as _boom boom_ filled his ears. slapping a hand over to his phone, his fingers swipe furiously at the screen to stop the alarm. soonyoung carries himself out of bed, throwing on a pair of black jeans and a t-shirt he is sure that isn’t his. hansol rolls over in his bed, eye bags dark, and soonyoung feels bad for waking up the poor kid. 

“hansol-ah, it’s time to get up.” 

the rapper sits up with a start, blinking up at him, “what time is it?” 

“it’s seven.”

soonyoung doesn’t miss the way hansol brings his knees to his chest, rubbing a fist into his tired eyes. soonyoung shoots an apologetic look to the boy, patting him on the head before closing the door behind him. 

soonyoung’s birthday is today. he feels a little old — he’s almost halfway to fifty, but he is happy to spend another year with his members. he feels the happiness radiate off of him, but it deflates as quickly as it had come. his members, minus hansol since he probably went back to sleep, were gathered around the living room eating breakfast, not even sparing the dancer a glance. soonyoung shrugs, understanding that it’s still too early to be awake. 

seungcheol pets his hair, “soonyoungie, we have a long day ahead of us. we have a photoshoot and practice today.”

soonyoung frowns, but he lets it go, “oh… that’s today, huh?” 

seungcheol passes by him without another word, heading to the kitchen for seconds, and soonyoung sinks in his seat, indulging himself in the bowl of jajangmyeon mingyu made last for dinner last night. he pouts at the fact the oldest member didn’t say anything about his birthday, but soonyoung knows that the day has only begun. he shrugs his shoulders, smiling down at the noodles.

⭒⭑⭒

at the photoshoot, soonyoung’s spirits have only dropped. he spots jeonghan speaking to joshua, both in deep conversation. soonyoung almost feels bad for interrupting, but it’s his birthday, so he gets a free pass. he huffs, marching over to jeonghan and burying his head in his shoulder. jeonghan gives him a weird stare, but lets the dancer use him as a pillow anyways.

“why are you being like this?”

soonyoung only mumbles in response, wanting attention from his hyung. he opens his eyes for a second, making eye contact with the youngest of the 95-line, and soonyoung shuts his eyes again, his heart sinking. joshua looks at him and shrugs. soonyoung sighs, trying to ease his mind in jeonghan’s warmth. 

his heart plummets to the floor as soonyoung feels jeonghan pry the dancer off his body. the older simply pats him on the head, running off with joshua to wherever the eldest of the 95-line was. 

soonyoung ignores the way the lump in his throat grows when neither look back at him. 

_there’s no way they forgot my birthday, right?_

soonyoung sulks, dragging his feet to his best friends. surely the 96-line won’t make him feel forgotten. surely they did not forget his birthday. they were the closest ones to him. 

“junnie, won, hoonie,” 

the chinese boy gives him a smile, and soonyoung can feel hope building in his chest. when junhui doesn’t say anything, he sighs. wonwoo pats the space next to him and soonyoung squeezes himself between the rapper and jihoon. jihoon doesn’t even look at him. soonyoung can feel the lump in his throat grow wider, his eyes filling with tears. 

“why are you crying? it’s just a photoshoot, soonyoung.” 

soonyoung swallows, looking up at his boyfriend. he is taken aback by how cold his boyfriend had sounded, it’s been a long time since soonyoung has heard jihoon speak for him that way. jihoon is sporting an expression that soonyoung knows it means that jihoon is unamused. soonyoung’s heart cracks, and he knows that the members really did forget his birthday after all. not even junhui remembered and their birthdays are five days apart. wonwoo, who is his best friend, didn’t even say anything to him. and jihoon, his boyfriend of five years, brushed him off like it was nothing. 

he gets up from his spot and leaves, his heart heavy in his chest and his vision blurry with tears.

⭒⭑⭒

soonyoung was alone, sitting on the park bench, tears streaming down his face. he sobs, listening to the birds chirping and shuddering under the gentle breeze kissing his cheeks.

after his best friends, and _boyfriend_ , ignored soonyoung, he decided to walk around. his photoshoot was done anyways. he bumped into mingyu and seokmin on the way, and he was delighted when his younger brothers showed him attention. mingyu and seokmin didn’t greet him, and though it bothered soonyoung, he decided it was better than being brushed off completely. minghao was leaning against a tree with a book curled in his hands, and minghao only gave him a small smile before waving him off, signaling that the chinese boy wasn’t interested in having a conversation. he found seungkwan, hansol, and chan playing a game of _cham cham cham_ , and when soonyoung asked if he could join in, the youngest shot him down. 

now, soonyoung was left alone, _on his birthday_. his heart aches at the realization that none of his members remembered his birthday. it wasn’t like soonyoung expected a big party or a bucket of gifts, but he at least expected his members to wish him a happy birthday and acknowledge his presence. he didn’t expect to be ignored and feel like an outsider. for the first time in five years, soonyoung felt alone. he hasn’t felt this way since their trainee days. soonyoung doesn’t remember falling asleep on the bench, his tears drying as he slept. 

he jolts awake as his phone vibrates in his pocket, “hello?”

soonyoung winces at the volume of the speaker, moving his phone away from his ear, “where the fuck are you? practice started thirty minutes ago.”

soonyoung shoots up from the bench, checking the time on his watch. _3:30pm_. he curses under his breath, muttering a small apology to the group’s leader. 

“yeah, whatever. just get here soon, we need you. the dance is a mess.” 

the line goes dead, and soonyoung doesn’t have time to feel sad as his adrenaline kicks in, his feet picking up speed with every step he takes. he bursts through the practice room and he shrinks under the weight of twelve pairs of eyes. 

when practice ended, soonyoung feels numb. everyone was quick to leave the practice room, so it was just him and hyelim left. the day was practically over, and he still didn’t hear anything from his members. his sister and parents had given him a call, and he was happy about that, but it didn’t make up for the loss. 

hyelim pulls soonyoung aside, “soonyoung, this choreography isn’t working. get some inspiration. come back when it’s fixed.” 

hyelim pushes him out, and soonyoung slumps against the closed door. the ringing in soonyoung’s ears was deafening, though he’s pretty sure it was his heart breaking.

⭒⭑⭒

soonyoung finds himself walking down the street that led to the company. after finding inspiration, soonyoung knew the answer. he decides that the choreography was perfect, but, _of course_ , hyerim was right — something was missing. he promises himself that he would fix the one part that didn’t seem to flow well, and then he would go to bed. it was a long day, and soonyoung was tired. soonyoung walks into the practice room with a yawn. once the door fully opens, screams fill his ears and confetti was thrown in his face. soonyoung stumbles back, gripping the door handle to keep himself grounded. he blinks at the twelve members in front of him. his heart stitches back together as tears fill his eyes. _they didn’t forget after all_.

“happy birthday, soonyoungie!” 

soonyoung breaks down in tears, and the members didn’t hesitate to scoop him up in his arms and kiss his tears away. 

“you guys didn’t forget,” soonyoung cries, wiping his hands on his jeans and sniffling, turning to face the boys he loved the most. 

seungcheol smiles, “of course we didn’t forget.” 

jeonghan runs a finger through soonyoung’s hair, “sorry we ignored you today, soonyoung-ah. we hope you forgive us.” 

“i do, i forgive you guys. i’m sorry for getting so upset, i should have known you wouldn’t have forgotten about me.” 

seungkwan rolls his eyes, “you know we’d never forget you, hyung. we love you so much.” 

soonyoung cries harder, letting himself be pushed around and manhandled. junhui pounces him from behind, pressing a kiss to his cheeks and hugs him. soonyoung smiles at his gemini twin, linking their pinkies together before the chinese boy happily skips away to the cake. seungkwan and seokmin are next to have their way with the birthday boy. the two youngest of their trio smear icing on his face, seungkwan belting the birthday song in his ear and seokmin wrapping him in streamers. chan and vernon join in, crowding around him like sharks. soonyoung groans, letting his younger brothers torment him. he laughs through his tears, and soonyoung feels lucky as they shovel cake into his mouth and tell him to stop crying because _“hyung, you’re a really ugly crier.”_

jeonghan and joshua back him up into the wall, forcing a birthday hat onto his head and sneaking pictures of the poor birthday boy for potential future blackmail. seungcheol pats him on the back, ruffling his hair. wonwoo scrunches his nose when he sees soonyoung. the rapper wraps the slightly older boy in his arms before chucking a whole chunk of soonyoung’s birthday cake into his hair. soonyoung shrieks and wonwoo only winks at him. 

minghao smiles at the birthday boy, patting him on the arm to avoid any cake, “happy birthday, hyung!” 

soonyoung’s heart swells at his little brother, and all soonyoung can manage to muster out is a small thanks to let him know he appreciates his words. soonyoung turns his head to the side, mingyu barreling towards him and soonyoung barely escapes the long limbs from taking out his eyes. mingyu smiles, teeth pointed and genuine. soonyoung can see the taller boy’s imaginary tail wagging. 

soonyoung feels his eyes well up with tears, his heart growing with love for each of his members. soonyoung feels a faint tap on his shoulder, and his heart stops in his chest. it’s jihoon wearing a fluffy pink sweater with a party popper in his mouth. when the confetti explodes from the package, soonyoung can’t help but laugh.

jihoon hands him a small box, and soonyoung bursts into tears all over again. 

“don’t cry, baby. it’s your birthday.” 

soonyoung is shocked at the tiny arms wrapping around his frame, but as quickly as it had come, it was gone. jihoon bats his eyelashes at him shyly, his cheeks as pink as his sweater. 

“happy birthday, soonyoung.” 

the birthday boy smiles at his boyfriend, his heart jumping into his throat. jihoon wipes away his tears and soonyoung can’t help but lean into his touch. jihoon wraps an arm around soonyoung’s waist as soonyoung lets his members push him out the door and into the car. soonyoung stops, his hand clutching the seatbelt as he wracks his brain to remember why he had come to the practice room in the first place. 

“but the choreography…” 

the members of the performance unit shush him, assuring their leader that they had figured it out. they knew that as the leader, soonyoung had many responsibilities. 

“hyung, it’s _fine_ , jun-hyung, minghao-hyung, and i already did it! we think you’ll really like it, hopefully it’ll make you proud,” chan brightens up, gushing at the ideas that the three of them came up with.

junhui agrees, nodding enthusiastically at every word the maknae said. minghao grumbles about how it’s better to _just show him_ at the young dancer when he starts to explain what the dance looks like, clamping a hand over chan’s mouth. soonyoung looks unsettled, wanting to protest, but when jihoon grips his hand a little tighter, soonyoung decides that it wasn’t that important anyways. 

soonyoung rests his head on jihoon’s shoulder, “hoonie, where are we going?” 

jihoon clicks his tongue, “dinner. for your birthday, you idiot.”

soonyoung furrows his eyebrows, “but it’s ten at night. it’s late now, what food place is even open at this hour?”

wonwoo scoffs beside him, smacking him in the head, “you talk too much.” 

the whole van erupts into laughter, and soonyoung can’t even feel insulted as he snuggles deeper into jihoon.

⭒⭑⭒

after the celebratory dinner, soonyoung feels lucky to have spent another year with the people he loved the most. by the time they got home, it wasn’t soonyoung’s birthday anymore, but soonyoung was still feeling the aftershocks. events of the day catch up to him, and soonyoung almost hits himself harder than how wonwoo did hours ago. he feels stupid to think that his members would ever forget his birthday. he feels embarrassed to have wasted so much time sulking. soonyoung knows he is loved, his birthday didn’t need to prove that. as thirteen bodies file into their shared dorms, the energies between them were calm. the members escape into their rooms, signifying the end of the night. with one final birthday wish from his members, soonyoung slips into his bedroom. his eyes dilate at the sight on his bed. it’s almost pathetic how jihoon still has this effect on him after being with him for so long.

“hi, soonyoungie.”

soonyoung walks over to jihoon, taking long strides, “hi, jihoonie.”

jihoon cocks his head to the side, “did you enjoy your birthday party?”

soonyoung giggles and nods, scratching the back of his neck, “it was the best! i love you guys.”

jihoon closes his eyes, pulling his bottom lip between his teeth, “i’m sorry for being so mean to you today, soonie.”

soonyoung rushes over to his side, embracing the younger boy in his arms, “don’t be, hoonie. i understand. i forgive you. besides, this was a great end to my birthday.”

jihoon wails, burying his face into soonyoung’s neck, breathing in his scent, “we’ve been together for five years, soonyoung. it was so hard for me to ignore you. it made me so sad watching you be sad. i don’t want you to think i don’t care about you.”

soonyoung kisses jihoon’s mole, his heart fluttering at the way jihoon’s eyelashes tickled his skin, “i know, baby. i know you care.” 

jihoon tugs at the sleeves of his sweater, “can i give you your gift now?”

soonyoung frowns, “jihoon, i told you, the song you wrote and the necklace was more than enough. it was cute, jihoonie!” 

soonyoung fidgets with the necklace around his neck, tracing the crescent shape on the chain. his eyes flicker to jihoon’s own necklace, smiling at the fact that his was a star. soonyoung feels his heart swell with love once more, thanking the gods above that jihoon had said yes to him all those years ago. jihoon's words when he gave soonyoung the necklace replay in his head, and soonyoung feels dizzy with how good they make him feel. 

_(“this one is for you because you always tell me i’m your glowing moon. this one is mine because, just as your name would suggest, you’re my shining star. without each other, we wouldn’t be able to exist. without you, i’m just a lonely rock who can’t glow without your light.”)_

jihoon shakes his head, “i think you’ll like this one the best.”

soonyoung raises his eyebrow, “yeah?”

jihoon breathes, “yeah.” 

and with that, jihoon’s lips were pressed against soonyoung’s. soonyoung feels the air leave his lungs, his senses filled with _jihoon, jihoon, jihoon_. arms wrap around his neck, and soonyoung groans, pulling jihoon into his lap. jihoon bites his bottom lip, and soonyoung lets him in. soonyoung trails his lips along jihoon’s jaw, his tongue licking a stripe across jihoon’s neck. jihoon whines as soonyoung nips at the skin, both of them knowing how dark the mark will be on jihoon’s pale complexion. soonyoung can’t help but feel proud that jihoon is his. 

when they pull away, jihoon giggles, fingers lacing into soonyoung’s. 

“did you like that?”

soonyoung kisses him again, harder than the last kiss. the passion and love soonyoung felt for the producer was being poured into the kiss. after five years, soonyoung loves jihoon even more. the tears soonyoung thought he had let out throughout the day fell once more, and soonyoung leans into the small hands that wipe them away. 

“god, why do you cry so much? you’re so ugly when you cry, you know.” 

“i love you,” soonyoung blurts out, shaking under the weight of jihoon’s gaze. jihoon kisses his knuckle, capturing soonyoung’s lips in another kiss. 

“i love you too. happy birthday, my brightest boy.”

⭒⭑⭒

soonyoung knows that he is extremely lucky. he didn't know what he did in his past life to deserve the life he has now. he has twelve best friends. he has a loving boyfriend. he has a family. he knows that wherever jihoon is, his heart will follow. wherever seventeen is, soonyoung knows that he's home. soonyoung sleeps the best that he’s had in a long time that night, jihoon tucked under his arm and their legs intertwined underneath the sheets. 

**Author's Note:**

> happy birthday to the rudest boy on the planet, kwon soonyoung  
> (and you too, mister wen junhui, don't think you're off the hook)
> 
> i'm so soft for our gemini boys, and though this was mainly soonhoon-centric, i had to add that small moment of the twins because it was CUTE, i couldn't let it go
> 
> that boy seriously needs to be stopped, but you're our bright boy anyways
> 
> title is from the english lyrics i wrote for home by seventeen! 
> 
> follow me on twitter: @glowingji !
> 
> as always, this is unedited; see you guys next time, let me know how this was! xx


End file.
